The Spinster's Exploits

…the fabulous words of Libby Purves on some of the shady ladies of Ambridge on the Radio 4 Archers Podcast – as insults go, this is a fabulous way to put down the less sexually continent! And a good reminder of the amazing history of some of the womenfolk and a reflection of the changes of sexual culture they – and we – have lived through.

As a seventy-year-old I grew up with the illegality of homosexuality, severe restrictions of female sexuality, the so-called sexual revolution, the acceptance of divorce and blended families, the pornification of culture and so much more…

I definitely have strong Archers Anarchist tendencies, and love the idea of Sanctimonious Shula or Posho Caroline having been labelled the Village Bike, despite the screaming double standards. Libby’s rollcall of the sexual shenanigans in Ambridge was hilarious and very diverse – an eye-opener to those who think it’s always cosy…

And the delve through The Archers, my awareness of the pornification of our culture and toxic misogyny as well as recent reports of strangulation being seen as a “normal” sexual activity have given me pause for thought.

I see myself as a sexual liberal but am aware that I have my blindspots and prejudices which I do my best to understand. I believe in sexual freedom but along with responsibility and protection. I also saw myself as pro-erotica and anti-porn, but am aware that is a matter of definition and even snobbery. I was also brought to a thoughtful standstill by friend’s daughter over a decade ago who saw porn as an everyday thing and had no problem with the idea of a boyfriend viewing it – it was a private matter for her. Would be interesting to get her update, though – she’s now a married mother of a couple of children…

I have no idea where boundaries should be, I just know that virginal youngsters’ introduction to sexuality shouldn’t be based on strangulation and/or a man coming over a woman’s face plus the idea that a hairy fanny is a filthy abomination.