The Spinster's Exploits

I was super-excited – my lover was taking me to see a Meatloaf tribute act – “Paradise Regained”

One of the less obvious feminist aspects of my persona is my love of the Album “Bat Out of Hell”. It is totally sexist, but captures teenage sexuality beautifully in the operatic madness of it all. I have said – and I’m sure I really could – write a feminist dissertation on the album. But that didn’t stop me literally bouncing in my seat and joining in with “I bet you say that to all the boys…!”

So much frustration and mismatch of desire permeates the album. I always knew Steinman must have had so much fun, so it was great when I saw a documentary a while back and learnt that he was deliberately boundary-pushing to see what he could get away with – that might just explain the faded Levis bursting apart and barely dressed seventeen-year-olds…

But amongst the raw sexiness and teenage angst there are a couple of songs that strike other chords. I have long used “two out of three ain’t bad” as the name of a syndrome that has driven me nuts over the years – those men who are allegedly so hung up on the ex who was “the one”, that they can’t possibly commit to you; but a shag/series of shags would be great while they sigh poetically and keep looking…

As a seventy-year-old polyamorist I have however decided that being wanted and needed is rather nice – as is liking and respecting our lovers and having fun. If everyone is on the same page, open and honest there is so much scope with two out of three…

So back to the album – After all the teenage drama and having to walk out of the door because s/he wouldn’t love one back I also adore ending with the equally mad, hyperbolic pseudo-adult “For Crying Out Loud”. I laugh along with the vows to thank, need, serve, want and hold while singing out of tune and getting the lyrics wrong. And then I totally melt by the final “For crying out loud, For that I love you, When you’re crying out loud, You know I love you”.

What can be a better ending for all that mad sex than an orgasm?* And there is something so gorgeously sexy about the sound of a lover’s orgasm – that delicious surrender at the end of a journey and the acknowledgement of pleasure and satisfaction. I have always loved witnessing lovers at that moment of “la petite mort”, the groan from the pit of one’s being, released from the depths and leaving one spent in the most positive way.

* If you’ve not read some of my previous rants posts – please note – I think sex is amazing and doesn’t have to end with orgasms, solo or mutual – I think of sex as circular and not a journey pounding to the same inevitable conclusion. But that said, orgasms are one of the lovely things some of us can give to others and ourselves…